do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Randomize
