remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
