oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Randomize