sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
