thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
