I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
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