It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize