I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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