Where are you?
In a non slutty way
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize