Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
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