i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize
