whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I can't put those talents on a resume
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
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