Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Randomize
