Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
