its not stalking. its research.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
this is an emotional support booty call
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
