yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
