When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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