Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
