Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Randomize
