Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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