yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Randomize