Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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