We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
how does that bad decision feel?
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
