I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
You need a sexual gate keeper
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
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