Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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