Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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