The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Randomize
