let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
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