I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
