Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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