I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
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