I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Randomize
