is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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