so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
