Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
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