Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Randomize
