so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
