i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
someone owes me an orgasm
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
