Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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