Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
