I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
The struggles of a small town man whore
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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