Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
i think im in europe. pls send help
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
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