Soap is not a condiment
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
