I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize