I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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