So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
Randomize
