He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
