Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
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