Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
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