so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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